The first night of the Married at First Sight Australia 2022 couple’s retreat came through with the drah-muh and Twitter was confused, obsessed, shocked and more.
Between warring brides, brightly coloured Adidas tracksuits and one of the most awkward attempts at a cheating scandal we’ve ever seen, Monday’s MAFS episode was all-around bonkers. If you are still struggling to process WTAF went on, well, you’re in luck because Twitter is here to help.
So, scroll on and let the netizens of Twitter guide you through the first night of Married at First Sight Australia 2022‘s Couples Retreat.
Carolina and Daniel’s Weird AF Date
Before the 2022 contestants left for the retreat, the drama had already arrived.
The episode started with a bang (not literally, but nearly literally, IYKYK). Carolina Santos and Daniel Holmes went on another date.
Daniel and Carolina are like a really boring Jersey Shore.#MAFS #MAFSAU
— So Dramatic! (@sodramaticpod) March 7, 2022
Apart from going to gym and eating breakfast, the biggest common thing between Daniel and Carolina is that they’re both fuckin’ boring.#MAFS #MAFSAU
— Married At First Sight Experts (@mafsexperts) March 7, 2022
The pair’s rendezvous did not include any breakfast or hip hop and was somewhere other than the gym. We were shocked, Twitter was shocked, Carolina was (probably) shocked.
I’ve watched hornier horror movies than Daniel and Carolina’s fire escape hornbag session.#MAFS #MAFSAU
— So Dramatic! (@sodramaticpod) March 7, 2022
Watching these two flirt like a pair of 13-year-olds was literally the most painful thing ever.
I’m 100% sure I overheard flirting like Daniel’s & Carolina’s back when I was 13 or so.#MAFS #MAFSAU pic.twitter.com/WJ9C0cvx5b
— Just Sue.🇺🇦 (@SueKennedy19) March 7, 2022
They also *magically* forgot they were mic’d up and being followed by cameras… and had a cheeky pash whilst whispering how “horny” they were. Noice.
When you first pull your YouFoodz out of the microwave.#MAFS #MAFSAU pic.twitter.com/zr6JlXmHYL
— So Dramatic! (@sodramaticpod) March 7, 2022
Meanwhile, Dion Was a King
Directly BEFORE Carolina’s not-so-spicy hookup with Daniel, she had tried to patch things up with her actual hubby, Dion Giannarelli.
Carolina waving the white flag in the form of groceries past their used by date.#MAFS #MAFSAU
— So Dramatic! (@sodramaticpod) March 7, 2022
The bride decided to do this in the form of a sh*tty food basket. We are surprised she didn’t opt for a YouFoodz care package, but whatever.
TFW you realise this is being filmed and will be aired around the country.#MAFS #MAFSAU pic.twitter.com/3shMXCzAS6
— So Dramatic! (@sodramaticpod) March 7, 2022
Dion was STOKED and OMG this poor, poor man…
Dion, mate, give up! #MAFSAU
— 🎀𝒩𝑒𝓈𝓈𝒶🎀 (@Nessa_1977) March 7, 2022
FINALLY It Was Retreat Time – But Things Weren’t So Positive For Domenica and Jack
After joking that she’d lob a boche ball at Carolina, Domenica Calarco needed to vent to the girls about some issues in her relationship with Jack Millar.
Domenica keeping things on the down low with the gurls
— Daz (@darren_handreck) March 7, 2022
#MAFS #MAFSAU #mafsaunz #MAFSAustralia pic.twitter.com/opbApTXkkG
The beautician vented that her husband “doesn’t make her feel sexy”. Sad face.
Rumour has it Dom’s voice can still be heard echoing across all the canyons & valleys of MAFS-land 🗣🗣🗣#MAFSAU #mafsaunz #MarriedatfirstsightAustralia #marriedatfirstsight pic.twitter.com/mk2l88bGRY
— Leto’s Burner (@MountainTedK) March 7, 2022
Seems like a normal chat, right? A quick gossip with the gals? WRONG! Jack was literally about a metre away and heard f*cking everything.
He was pissed. So, his best mate Brent Vitiello went to “feel her out” (weird choice of words, but we digress) and let Domenica know Jack was in the know.
“Omg, I thought it was a private conversation between me, the girls, the camera crew and the folks at home.” #MAFSAU
— Sinead O’Rebellion (@ICountedItTwice) March 7, 2022
Like a forlorn paddle pop 😪🍦#Mafs #MAFSAU https://t.co/nT95jWyGcF
— Amy… (@xMissxAmyx) March 7, 2022
Domenica went to try and iron out the tensions with Jack.
Somehow, she made it worse.
Dom worrying about bringing up delicate topics #MAFSAU #MAFS pic.twitter.com/cB3AbStoEJ
— Jodie (@jodielongton) March 7, 2022
The bride bought up the host of underlying issues in the pairs’ relationship and Jack was blindsided AF (and MAFS Twitter died a little inside).
Woof. This went from 0 to 100 real quick. #mafs #mafsau pic.twitter.com/xjb5b4HATW
— Ira Snave (@IraSnave) March 7, 2022
It all kicked off when Domenica tried to apologise and Jack said “like, no f*ck off” so she heeded his advice and f*cked off.
Me if my partner tells me to fuck off: #MAFS #MAFSAU #MarriedatfirstsightAustralia #Marriedatfirstsight pic.twitter.com/3PVuLiVdYy
— mimi petrakis (@MimiPetrakis) March 7, 2022
Olivia Made a Weird AF Admission
Confessing that she’s not always the “nice girl”, Olivia Frazer revealed that she once hated a bridesmaid dress that her friend had picked out for her wedding.
The teaching student lamented that the dress was “ugly and brown” and looked like “poo”.
Olivia outing herself as being a stone cold psycho.#MAFS #MAFSAU
— So Dramatic! (@sodramaticpod) March 7, 2022
So, she did what any normal girl would do and cut the dress up into pieces and mailed it back to the friend.
all of us deleting any tweet about how cute olivia was at the start of the season #MAFSAU pic.twitter.com/h9U3P4fK5t
— jas🍋 (@jas74056987) March 7, 2022
Girls and Boys Night Commenced
Following a long, hard day of drama, the contestants decided to “wind down” with their first girls’ and guys’ nights of the MAFS couples retreat and Twitter was living for the tension.
Jack vented to the boiz and Jackson Lonie actually offered positive and helpful advice.
Gonna say .. I dont normally say ‘yea the boys’ unironically
— Minerva (@rooteruditorum) March 7, 2022
But … ‘yea the boys’ for healthy chats #mafs #mafsau
At the same time, Jackson’s wife, Olivia, decided to brag about how spicy her sex life was, as if she just hadn’t listened to Domenica complain about her own…
Olivia lauding her orgasm in front of Dom. #MAFS #MAFSAU pic.twitter.com/SvhJgvWfv4
— Emily Tammes (@EmilyTammes) March 7, 2022
Lol I wish Olivia stayed blacked out post orgasm.#MAFS #MAFSAU
— So Dramatic! (@sodramaticpod) March 7, 2022
Our fave MAFS babe Al Perkins did the worm and jumped in a swamp. Al is the saviour of the couples retreat and has our hearts 4ever. MAFS Twitter agrees.
Me at 7pm: I’m only having one drink tonight.
— So Dramatic! (@sodramaticpod) March 7, 2022
Me at 1am: #MAFS #MAFSAU pic.twitter.com/OKOTtvdjXQ
Sh*t Hit the Fan Between Domenica and Olivia and Carolina
Ah, it wouldn’t be a MAFS couples retreat without a massive blowup, right?
Whilst the boiz were living their best life on their bros night, the same couldn’t be said for the gals.
Mad vibes tonight #MarriedAtFirstSightau #MAFSAU #MAFSAustralia pic.twitter.com/HlKghKepAX
— Hanni (@hannifahakbari) March 7, 2022
After Olivia bragged to Domenica about her “glorious” sex life, tensions were already high. The brides turned the heat up by raising the issues between Domenica and Carolina that had emerged at the preceding commitment ceremony. *Sigh*.
Dom VS Carolina. #mafs #mafsau pic.twitter.com/mP56PrDdTq
— MAFSCommentary (@MafsCommentary) March 7, 2022
The Italian called the Brazillian out (again) for being rude AF to Dion.
Dom speaking facts #MAFSAU pic.twitter.com/bRoHSujp6F
— Kel K (@KelKnez) March 7, 2022
Olivia revealed she and Jackson had preempted the beef comparing it to “a great white shark and a crocodile” and said she was “excited to see it play out”. WTF?
Wish the shark and the crocodile would turn on the Olivia snake….#MAFSAU
— pickynicky (@m00ndoggiespot) March 7, 2022
“Jackson and I had a thought”; and not one fuck was given #mafs #MAFSAU
— Y a s m i n🧡🥭 (@mango_heaux) March 7, 2022
They then yelled a lot. Olivia attempted to tone police Domenica, as she had several times prior to the couples’ retreat. MAFS Twitter collectively rolled their eyes.
For someone who just had a blackout orgasm, Olivia is sure acting like a nasty bitch #MAFSAU pic.twitter.com/GiEF5IdsO5
— Kiki 🦋 (@kikikxxx) March 7, 2022
Then, we saw the one move we’d been waiting for: Domenica smashing a glass on the table in frustration.
I mean those of us who are #rhobh fans have been there done that. #mafs #mafsau pic.twitter.com/Z6Jnc2E00r
— Ira Snave (@IraSnave) March 7, 2022
When your friend makes you a bridesmaid but the bridesmaid dress is ugly.#MAFS #MAFSAU pic.twitter.com/YXQDhboLcu
— So Dramatic! (@sodramaticpod) March 7, 2022
Glass went f*cking everywhere.
Two excellent charcuterie platters ruined #MAFS #MAFSAU
— Andrew Masters (@Lakitoo) March 7, 2022
The other brides were shook.
Selina calling Cody from the table like #MAFSAU pic.twitter.com/s66Gzsb4vu
— Not Leah (@notnotleah) March 7, 2022
Did anyone else see Kate buffering just then? #MAFSAU
— Darshalina (@darshalina) March 7, 2022
The episode ended with a preview for Tuesday night’s episode in which Olivia called Domenica “white trash”. The classist undertones of this entire argument were not it…
OOOFFFTTTT. Did she really just say white trash?! Excuse me while I go punch the cushions on my couch for a few minutes. #MAFS #MAFSAU pic.twitter.com/p0tdtPuYX2
— Maddison Turner (@maddsturner92) March 7, 2022
“Aye aye aye” – everyone on Twitter. What a start to the MAFS couples’ retreat, eh?
Me after watching the last minute of #MAFS #MAFSAU pic.twitter.com/Zk5olj0NEh
— TeacherIsTeaching (@amyj77) March 7, 2022
Want even more goss about Married at First Sight Australia 2022? Listen to episode 157 of the So Dramatic! podcast with Megan Pustetto here!
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